She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
Randomize