I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
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