I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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