You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
Just chased the kids into the backyard with kitchen knives. Best. Babysitters. Ever.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
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