Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Randomize
