About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
I just realized I haven't looked at our horoscopes lately. If mine says anything about tweakers, I'm burning my phone.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
BURN THE PHONE.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
Randomize
