When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
I will be naked everywhere
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
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