Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize
