good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize