You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
You've changed since you got that strap on
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
