; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Randomize