Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
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Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
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