Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
