i caught a guy at work today stealing condoms. i let him go when i realized that they were extra small.
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
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