the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
Randomize
