I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
