Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Randomize
