Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
At least make sure they are 18
Why
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
Randomize
