I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
The best revenge is premature balding
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Randomize
