my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Randomize
