You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
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