I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
Dicks are not precious.
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
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