Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
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