Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
