Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
Well I just put wine in my tea
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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