Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
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