i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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