Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.