Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
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