Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
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