Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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