Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize