I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
Drake has all the answers
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
Randomize
