My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
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