i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
