i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
try to milk me bitch
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
Randomize
