Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I have $4.22 in my bank account, just wrote a check for a tooth brush from quikmart, and bought a 25 cent condom from the bathroom. i don't know whats more sad, my bank account or the fact that i'm entrusting my entire future to a condom machine that was probably last filled in 1970
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize