He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
Randomize
