Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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