it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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