my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
Segways are the fanny packs of transportation. Useful in some situations, but you always look like a tool when using one.
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
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