Where is the hickey?
I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
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