New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
Randomize
