her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
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