Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
Randomize