don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
