so that wasnt chicken after all
I am in a vortex of obligation.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
