hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
