I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
