my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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