im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
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