Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
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