is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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