At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Randomize
